Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Accepting your children for who they are . . .

I have always considered myself to be fairly open-minded and accepting of my children. While I grew up in a home where it was expected that I would go to college after high school, I have decided that it doesn't matter to me if my children go or not. If they find a job they love that doesn't require a college degree, then I will be happy for them. If they spend 4+ years in college pursuing a degree to get them in a job they want, then that is fine too. My main goal is their happiness.

I've recently discovered that I'm not as open-minded as I thought. My oldest daughter, Peanut, is very shy. She interacts with others in class, sports, etc, but won't play with others if given the option. She'd much prefer to just play alone. When I see her play alone, I assume she must be lonely. I assume that she'd be happier if she was playing with others. She loves to play with her sister, so she must want to play with these other children too, right? Well, I have spent the past month trying to "fix" her so that she will play with others, only to come to the realization that I might be wrong. Perhaps she does just enjoy playing by herself. Just because I enjoy interacting with others more often than not doesn't mean that she is the same. So, now I must try to change all that I previously believed - to accept my daughter as she is. She is a beautiful, intelligent, fun, kind, sensitive child that enjoys some time to herself. She is perfect just the way she is.


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